Teenage Mother
by oOoIZZYoOo
Summary: Olga always loved her baby sister, and at one point in time, Helga loved her in turn. Years have flown by like seconds on the clock and now all Olga can do is recollect on her memories, trying to find out how things turned out as screwed up as they did.
1. Part One

**Teenage Mother**

"BABY SISTER! I'M HOME!" Olga threw open the door to Helga's apartment, it had been nearly two years since she had seen Helga last, their last visit being Helga's wedding in France. It was such a beautiful sight, white lights had cascaded across the aisle, soft pink petals floated down upon them from the tree's that overlooked the night of matrimony.

Helga had never looked so beautiful in her life. Miriam had of course had a fit when she noticed the white converse peeking out from underneath her smooth princess like wedding gown, but Olga could only smile and wipe away the tears from her eyes.

Her favorite part of the entire ordeal was seeing the grooms face light up with joy, a sense of awe and inability to breath caressing over his body as she walked down the aisle. Their eyes never left one another throughout the entire ceremony.

Olga giggled recalling Helga's embarrassed face as he kissed her cheek and down to her lips. The way that she scrunched up her face, unable to hide the joy s he felt as he hugged her. And just like that, her little baby sister had gone from an awkward teenager with too much anger to a glorious and elegant woman. A woman in love.

She started calling herself Helga Shortman after that night, her Pataki name gone forever. Olga couldn't help but feel like she was glad to be rid of it, rid of the memories that the name burdened. Once that name was lifted off of her shoulders her anger and hate disappeared with it.

That was why Olga was so surprised when she received the call from Helga asking her if she wanted to come and visit the two in New York. Without even a moment of hesitation she screamed yes into the phone and began packing.

What she saw when she opened the door however was not what she had expected in the least…

Olga suddenly shrieked as though she had seen some sort of horrible monster had crawled into her skin. Helga took a loud and rather obnoxious bite of her beef jerky, hiding her growling as an odd type of knaw as she chewed.

"Good to see you too Olga." Helga muttered angrily. Olga's eyes traveled over her sister who was now lounging in a rather large lazy-boy, her eyes glued to the t.v, her ankles had swollen up to almost twice their normal size, her feet barely fitting in her pink bunny slippers.

"You're- you're-"

Helga stared at Olga in a rather bored manner as Olga pointed shakily at the rather large and protruding belly that Helga had produced. Helga rubbed it absent mindlessly as Olga dropped things in the door frame. Her high heels clunked loudly against the wood floor as Olga ran towards her little sister. She dropped down on her knees, her finger poking at the round mass.

"Are you…or-…or did you just get fat?" Olga asked hopefully. Helga twitched and hit her sister upside the head. Olga whined and leaned down on the floor as Helga rolled her eyes.

"It's a kid, not my lunch Olga."

Olga blinked for a few moments, taking her spot peeking over the arm rest like a small child. She poked it again, her face twisted in confusion as she did it again. Suddenly her eyes went with with shock as she quickly threw up her arms.

"Helga I can't feel the baby kicking! Something's wrong!" Olga screamed. Helga twitched and threw out her arm, grabbing onto Olga's wrist before slamming Olga's palm over her belly. Olga waited in fear, her entire being focused on the nerve endings on that hand. And then- there it was.

Thud.

Olga jumped pulling her hand back. Something had actually moved. Something had moved inside of her sister's stomach. Olga quivered as her eyes rolled into the back of her head, a small high whimper leaving her lips before her head hit the ground.

Helga glanced over at her sister who now lay unconscious on the floor. Helga sighed before getting up.

"God damn it Olga."

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"Damn it what is it Miriam, I'm KINDA busy here." Bob bolted out in his normal irritated voice as Miriam stood in front of him, eyes far off from where she stood. Her cheeks were bright red and the bags underneath her eyes had become heavy on her young face. When she didn't speak Bob looked up at her, not moving from his seat.

"Miriam you been drinking?" He asked, for once concern actually present. Miriam hiccuped, a quick answer to his question. Miriam fell back onto the couch, staring at the wall as she wiped her dry eyes. From how red they were it was obvious she had been crying.

"Come on Miriam spit it out, what's wrong?" Bob grunted.

Silence followed as Miriam opened her lips, the words escaping her. She started to sob, diving her head into her hands and Bob rolled his eyes. He threw out his hand standing up as he started to yell. A small girl stood outside of her home, hand tenderly sitting on the door knob. Her hands shook as she turned the handle.

The front door creaked open as a small girl crawled through the home front. Her long blonde hair, braided neatly down her back moved gently with the breeze as she approached the living room quietly. Navy blue eyes cast small glances up at her parents as she hugged her books to her chest.

"Filthy drunk!" She heard her father screaming. She flinched before quickly running into the room.

"Dad, dad guess what, I got an A on my test!" She suddenly yelped out. Bob's face quickly turned to the small girl, dressed in a long blue plaid skirt and white blouse with black mary-janes. His face slowly melted from anger as he laughed out, throwing his hands into the air.

"THAT'S MY OLGA!" He laughed out picking her up quickly. Olga forced a smile nodding quickly.

"My perfect little girl." He cooed hugging her to his chest. Olga patted his back, letting out a breath of relief as she closed her eyes. After years of searching she'd finally found her father's calm button, winning and perfection.

And lord help them when they gave him anything less. She flinched in recollection of city academic completion she had competed in fourth grade. It was down to her and her best friend from Sunnydale Elementary School, Robert Nicholas. He was a sweet kid, thick glasses and straggly hair. She would often go over to his house after school to avoid facing her parents. They had studied for the completion for weeks together.

They were close…

At least she thought.

He knew all about the pressure placed upon her, while some parents threatened their children with the loss of video games or time with friends, a failure on Olga's part meant utter rejection or worse yet, attention of the worst kind.

The stage lights were bright the night of the competition, Olga was dressed her best and sweat dripped down her brow from the heat. She pummeled in answers one after the other, trying not to allow her parents to see her in a bad light.

"What is the capital of India?"

Her hands were shaky and missed the button, Robert buzzed in with the correct answer. Olga felt her breathing become heavy as she shot her eyes toward the score. They were tied even with less than one question to go. Her eyes darted to her parents in the audience, hoping for some kind of support.

Instead she watched as her father screamed, though his voice was unheard through the crowd. Her mother looked at the wall blankly trying her best to ignore him as he shook her thin shoulders, on a rampage she had become all too familiar with.

"What is the state bird of Maine?"

He bunched his hand into a fist, waving it at her warningly. Miriam rolled her eyes and pushed him away in disgust. Olga's lips fell apart as tears glittered in her dark eyes.

"The chickadee!"

Olga gasped and looked over at Robert quickly. The announcer yelled out that he was correct and the crowd went wild, but it was all quiet to Olga. She gulped not even daring to look at her father's face. That night he made sure she never forgot that answer again…

"Why is mommy crying?" Olga asked quietly. Bob rolled his eyes and grunted.

"Hell if I know, she's drunk, that's the fourth time this week." Bob let Olga go to plop himself down on the couch once more. Olga made her way over to her mother, gently rubbing her soft blonde strands as she leaned into her.

"Mom what's wrong? Are you ill? Did something happen?" Olga asked lovingly. Miriam stared at the wall, not making a sound as Bob flipped through the channels. Without any warning she suddenly doubled over, vomiting over the floor. Bob jumped and scooted away from her as Olga quickly moved to hold her mother's hair back.

"Mom?"

"JESUS MIRIAM!" Bob yelled out already edging out of the room. "Couldn't you have gone in that bathroom to do that? Look it's all over the carpet!"

Miriam's brows knitted together in fury as she snapped her head up, wiping her mouth quickly.

"I'm pregnant you jackass." Miriam muttered. Olga and Bob both stared at her, taken back by her sudden confession. Olga had just turned twelve only a few months ago so having another baby right now didn't seem ideal but…

"Oh Mom that's wonderful! A new little life to bring us joy, I'm so excited! Congratulations!" Olga giggled out throwing her arms around her mother. Miriam didn't hug her back however as she stared at Bob in contempt. He growled and threw the remote down on the ground, shattering it.

"We already have one perfect daughter Miriam, that's all I wanted, ONE! And we're almost rid of her! Now you're telling me I've got another eighteen years stuck in this hell hole with you?" Bob screamed. Miriam scowled and shook her head.

"Fuck you Bob."

"Yea, say when's the last time you've done that huh, so whose kid is this, is that fucking newspaper boy that keeps coming around here. I know that way you look at him, have you two been screwing around my back?" Bob yelled.

Olga detached herself from her mother and looked between the two, they fought a lot but something about this one was different. Something about this fight was…scarier.

"Dad, um, my teacher says that I can probably go to a special middle school for really smart people. She keeps saying how gifted I am. A-a-and, I got invited to play at a classical concert in San Francisco, and…and…" her father couldn't hear her over his own screaming as Miriam rubbed her temple.

"Trust me it's yours. I can already feel it kicking like a damn racehorse." Miriam muttered. Bob scrunched up his face before mumbling under his breath, still cursing her in a small voice. Miriam stood, not bothering to clean herself up as she headed into the kitchen.

"I need a drink…" She mumbled.

"What you need is a coat hanger." Bob snapped out. Olga looked back and forth between her parents fighting back tears as she started up the stairs unnoticed. Olga narrowed her eyes gently onto her mother as she started to chug a bottle of vodka. Her eyes drifted to Miriam's stomach and with a gentle gulp Olga clenched onto the stairwell tightly.

"…don't worry baby sister…I'll protect you from them…you'll see."

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"Baby sister did you spill your drink?" Olga's eyes wandered down as Helga suddenly blinked.

"Oh…well it looks like my water broke. Call the hospital would ya sis? Tell them I'm coming in." Helga let out a whelp as she pushed herself off the chair, wobbily making her way to the front door as she grabbed her keys. Olga yelped and grabbed them from her, quickly grabbing her coat and throwing it over Helga's shoulders.

"Oh my god! You're giving birth! What do we do? Hot water! And towels!" Olga yelled out, going into a frenzy. Helga rolled her eyes and took the keys once more.

"I'm not giving birth you dumb ass, that won't start for another couple of hours. Just get in the damn care and grab my bag would you, I kind of can't bend over." Helga admitted. Olga nodded quickly and grabbed Helga's overnight bag from beside the door.

"A-ah alright, here I'll drive, you're not fit to right now!" Olga demanded as she tried to grab the keys. She dropped the bag in the process and quickly leaned down to grab it. Helga raised a brow and shook his head.

"Actually I think you're more impaired than I am, there's a paper bag in there for when you start hyperventilating." Helga stated flatly. Olga crossed her brows in annoyance as she took in a long breath.

"I am not going to start- ahh" Olga felt her chest tighter as she gasped for breath. Helga rolled her eyes and passed her the lunch bag from her backpack. Olga clasped her lips around it and started to breathe in and out quickly.

"Come on Miss Perfect, I want to get to the hospital before the searing pain kicks in if you don't mind."

The birth of Helga was done and quickly forgotten. When asked what they were going to name their daughter Bob promptly replied-

"I don't know…what's that other name for Olga? Let's just go with that. "

Miriam and Bob held her for a moment in the hospital, at least until the nurses left. Olga had sat in the waiting room until she saw her mother wheeling out. Bob commented that he had some beeper business to attend to and promptly left.

Miriam still as dazed as ever wheeled herself down to the food court leaving the room unattended. Olga looked around for a few moments, expecting the doctor to come back with her sister but no one came. It was only when she heard a paralyzing cry that she realized the truth. Helga had been left in the room unattended.

Olga quickly ran into the room, her heart sinking as she realized that the first thing Helga had ever seen of this world was an abandoned room.

She reached down picking the girl up from under her armpits. Helga fussed but stopped crying, that was good enough for Olga. Her eyes lit up as she studied the small girl.

"…you're so little." Olga giggled out.

"Nnn?" Helga tilted her head making Olga coo as she quickly hugged the girl to her chest. Helga made a grunt of annoyance and moved her hands quickly against Olga's skin. Olga sat down, moving her finger to poke the baby's nose. Helga squished up her face before sneezing gently.

It was the first time that she had held a baby but she'd watched a lot of movies on the television where the mother tilted her elbow to hold up the baby's head. Olga repeated the movement and gently cradled the innocent creature.

"Hi Helga…I'm your big sister…"

Helga blinked up at her, tuffs of blonde hair already showing on her nearly bald head.

"I have a feeling that we're going to be the best of friends baby sister…I just know it!"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"Mom I'm home…"

Olga walked through the door, her green plaid skirt playing against her legs as she started to undo the bow. Thanks to a recommendation from her elementary school Olga had been transferred to a specialty school only a few miles away. Her father drove her there every morning right at the stroke of seven.

Each day Olga would go through her classes, piano, yearbook, school government, and scholastic science bowl with an after school club for each day of the week (including weeknds). It was a long and tough schedule but Olga had learned to handle it with ease.

"Mom?" Olga peeked her head in the living room with a sigh as she noticed her mother asleep on the couch. Olga rolled her eyes and went into the kitchen to start dinner, her father would be home soon and there was no way she was going to get screamed at for her mother's incompetence.

Olga grabbed some noodles from the cupboard, breaking them into three as she boiled some water. She stopped as she thought she heard a faint cry from the upstairs rooms. Olga quickly slammed the cupboard shut and ran into the living room. Helga's play pen was set up right?

Olga headed over to it, peering in, her eyes widened as she gasped and ran up the stairs.

"Helga! Helga?" Olga screamed as she threw open the doors to each of the rooms, scanning quickly for the small child. It would be her first birthday in a few months, and although she was showing to be highly intelligent for her age she still had some developmental issues. The doctors silently suspected it was because of Miriam's heavy drinking throughout her pregnancy.

All of the rooms were empty.

Olga felt herself going into an asthma attack as she realized that the baby was missing. Olga threw her hands on top of her head and yelled, the only action she was capable of doing with such high strung nerves.

And then-

Olga's head popped up as she heard a ever so faint and soft cry coming from on of the doors near her. Olga held her breath, tip toeing across the carpet so that she could hear the cry as well as possible. She stepped into her mother's room and it became louder. Olga opened up the door to the bathroom but the sound only became fainter.

But that only left-

Olga threw open the doors to her parents walk in closer, her body sighing with relief as she spotted the faintly crying baby sitting on the floor. Olga shook her head as she picked Helga up, smoothing down her bright blonde hair before kissing her cheek over and over.

"It's ok baby sister, I'm here." Olga whispered to her. She tossed the girl up and down comfortingly, noticing how thing she had gotten. How often had mom been feeding her? Olga pulled Helga at an arm's length, noticing for the first time how weak and malnourished she had become.

Helga blinked sleepily as Olga shook her head, she always fed Helga dinner when she got home since her mother always 'forgot' but she had at least trusted Miriam to give her SOME attention while Olga was off at school.

She sighed heavily and grabbed a bottle from the mini-fridge inside of her parents room. She tipped Helga back gently, pressing the bottle to her lips as she moved down the stairs and outside of the house. The hospital was only a few miles away, she could walk it…

Helga looked up at Olga gratefully as she sucked down the milk quickly, her feet starting to kick with the newfound energy. Olga looked down upon her sister with care as she patted her back. She was so innocent and full of life, she didn't cry too much and all she ever wanted was her parents love and attention.

So why didn't get they ever give it to her?

Olga sighed already thinking about how she how she could rearrange her schedule to get home to feed Helga during her lunch hour. She'd had to drop all the after school activities too so she would be able to baby sit until her father got home…

Olga flinched as she felt Helga pulling at her hair. She twisted up her face trying to get it out of her tiny fingers.

"You've got a grip kiddo." She laughed out as she kissed the small girls nose. Her favorite place to be kissed…

Helga let go, squealing in delight as she suddenly threw out her back, arching up into Olga's lips. Olga smirked and kissed her again, sending the child into pure ecstasy as she laughed. Olga hugged her soft body into her own as she sighed.

"…why don't they love you like I do…?"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"AAHHH! WHEREVER YOU ARE FOOTBALL HEAD I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU **SO** MUCH!"

Helga screamed out filling the hospital halls so that her voice carried throughout all of the rooms. A nurse stood behind her, quickly wheeling her into the room they had reserved for such a date. Olga ran beside her sister, biting her fingers and casting a glance around her.

"You're doing great baby sister." Olga cooed as Helga doubled over crying out. Olga gulped and quickly moved to the side as Helga threw out her arm in a feeble punch wanting to hit something, anything to make her feel better.

"Here baby sister just squeeze my hand before you hurt someone." Olga offered laying out her hand gently onto Helga's arm. Almost a little too quickly Helga grabbed onto it like a steel claw, her fingers digging into Olga's skin as she screamed bloody murder once more, her grip becoming tighter with each throbbing contraction.

"AHH! GOD THIS SUCKS!" Helga screamed tossing her head back and forth as she squeezed onto Olga tighter. Olga whimpered, watching as the blood flow to her hand was cut off.

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"I loathe you." It was the first thing that came out of Olga's mouth as she entered the door. Almost teasingly Helga sat in her baby walker, sucking her thumb right in the middle of the damn hallway, staring her down like a pest that just wouldn't go away. Her eyes brightened at the sight of her caretaker as she yelped in happiness, holding out her arms as is to say-

'Good you're here, now, get me out of this damn contraption so I can make your life a living hell!'

Olga stared the small child down, slamming the door behind her. The slam seemed to trigger something in the baby's mind and her lip went into a pout, a typical cute reaction to deflect Olga's anger. Oh yes babies had it all figured out didn't they? You get mad at them, they cry, you don't pay attention to them, they cry, they make your life a living hell and need a way to get away with it? They cry.

God kept that baby in its mom's womb for nine months for a reason, and that reason was so the mother would have so much invested in the stupid thing she wouldn't kill it. Right away that is…

But Olga didn't carry the child in her nor did it have her beautiful green eyes or her chin or nose. No, Helga had nothing of Olga's, in fact; she didn't look a damn thing like her.

"You're an ugly baby." There, she said it. Yes, not all babies were cute and adorable and just so freaking fuzzy wuzzy like the lifetime movies would have you believe. Helga was an ugly baby. Sure her features might have been considered cute by the vaguest of standards, but her inside was dark and cold and ruthless and mean.

At least Olga had convinced herself of that.

Olga slammed her keys and backpack down on the floor in one drop. Helga's eyes watered. They said in some study that babies could read people better than adults could, Olga didn't doubt this, after all they had to know when to look cute and cry. It wasn't as easy of a task as they made it out to be.

"Don't think that you're getting out of it this time Helga, I'm mad at you. You've ruined my life and I'm not going to pretend anything different for a moment longer!" Olga screamed. Helga's lip trembled as she started to hiccup, rubbing her eyes with her tiny little baby fingers. Olga's pose wavered.

Cunning baby, cunning…

"Oh let me guess you're going to cry is that it?" Olga placed her hands on her hips even though her heart was shaking inside. Helga didn't seem to notice this and burst into tears. Olga rolled her eyes, kicking the walker lightly with her feet so that Helga was caught in the one corner of the room she could never seem to get out of.

Olga had had to fish her out of that spot a million times.

Helga blinked the tears from her eyes and wiggled in her walker trying to push off of something to get out of her conundrum. She started to panic, her eyes going wide with terror as she flailed her arms this way and that. She quickly turned to where Olga was walking, her small arms reaching out for her.

"Eh! EH!" Helga cried. Olga rolled her hand nonchalantly, not looking back at her. She went into the kitchen instead, leisurely pulling open the refrigerator door. Olga stuck her head into the fridge, pushing aside a container of ketchup and some left over pizza.

Olga grabbed a soda from the back of the fridge placing her fingers underneath the tin before popping it up. She could still hear Helga's screaming from the hallway as she chugged down half the can. Olga quickly wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, walking out into the hallway. Olga glared down at the crying toddler, sitting down on her knees so that the two were face to face.

"Do you know WHY I loathe you little Helga?" Olga asked raising a brow. Helga did not answer, not that she expected her to. Olga stood up gulping down the rest of her soda quickly. She crushed the can in her hands and tossed it into the hallway basket.

"I'll tell you baby sister, it's because you've officially ruined my life." Olga snapped. Helga wailed louder interrupting her explanation; Olga leaned down and picked her out of her walker, tossing her in her arms roughly until she got quiet.

"For instance, do you know how many times I've had to tell my friends that I couldn't go hang out with them because I had to babysit you? Even today I had to tell the hottest, sweetest, most wonderful boy in school, Spencer Crawford, that I couldn't go to the spring fling with him- because of _you_."

Olga placed Helga down in her play pin, at least this way she could find something to do with herself while Olga vented. However even when surrounded by her favorite toys Helga's young eyes remained fixated on her big sister.

This pissed Olga off.

"You know, I could be the best big sister in the world and you won't remember a thing come two years from now, so really why should I even try?" Olga yelled as she threw her arms up in the air. She could hear Helga answer her in a soft gurgled response.

"Why not just be cruel to you until your memory's wiped clean right? Payback for being so mean to me?" Olga asked the small girl. Helga's long lashes flickered in response making Olga bite her lip. She threw her hands down onto the play pen, gripping it harshly.

"All I wanted was to be normal you know! Why'd you have to come along and ruin all of that! I wish I never even had a sister!" Olga screamed. She closed her eyes in fury, almost unable to believe her own behavior. A small sound, or rather, a word slowly called Olga out of her head as she felt silky skin touching her tight knuckles.

"…what did you say?" Olga whispered. Helga grinned a large nearly toothless grin at her.

"Sister!" Helga sounded out sloppily. Olga blinked down at her. Did she-

Olga reached down numbly, holding her up into the air as Helga giggled in delight, tossing her arms back and forth happily.

"Sister!" She repeated.

"…Sister…Olga…Olga, your sister." Olga whispered. She gulped as Helga merely giggled, repeating the word over and over again. Her heart started to fill with something she hadn't felt in a long time, something she almost didn't recognize. Olga carefully cupped Helga's small frame to her chest as she dug her head into her puffy blonde hair.

"Sister!"

Very cunning baby….very cunning indeed.

Olga sighed heavily and hugged her baby sister tighter to her, biting her lip as she fought back years. Why did she have to go and say all of those mean things to her? Even if she didn't remember them a year, or two from now, Olga still would.

"…I'm sorry…it's not your fault. It's just…it's been a long day." Olga mumbled under her breath. She pulled Helga back to look at her face, she continued to giggle and wiggle about on Olga's arm. Olga decided to take that as a sign she was forgiven.

"Alright baby sister, time to for your nap, would you like Elizabethan poetry or Shakespeare sonnets today?"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

Olga groaned as her door creaked open, the sounds of her parents screaming making her open up her eyes. The light shined into her dark room as she sat up, rubbing her eyes softly. The small pitter patter of feet against her carpet floor gave her the clue to her midnight visitor.

"Olga…are you awake…?" Helga asked. Olga sat up nodding as Helga tried to climb onto the bed. Her pale fingers gripped at the sheets, her mouth grunting as she started to pull herself up. Olga smirked and moved her hand underneath Helga's feet, giving her a gentle push. Helga plopped next to Olga with a huff before sitting up straight.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Olga asked quietly as Helga squirmed on top of the pink blanket. Helga nodded her head and flinched as a particularly loud yell erupted from the hallway. Olga moved her hands over Helga's ears as an earth shattering slap ran through the house.

Miriam cried out, spouting out curse words. Olga closed her eyes tightly as she felt Helga shaking from underneath her grip.

"What is he doing to mommy? Why is he doing that?" Helga whimpered out quietly. Olga flinched as a vase broke, she forced on a smile and quickly turned to her little sister, holding up a finger.

"Baby sister I have a present for you, would you like to see?" She asked lowly. Helga blinked for a few moments, curiosity getting the best of her as she quickly nodded. Olga smiled a bit bigger, glad she took the bait. Slyly she headed over to her dresser, pushing the door closed with her foot as she searched through her drawer's contents.

"Hmm let's see here…" she pushed aside her favorite necklaces and bracelets, things that would be unfitting for a little girl. With a small 'aha' Olga pulled out a bright pink ribbon, tying it around her wrist as she closed the drawer.

Helga's eyes immediately brightened as she spotted it, her arms becoming fidgety as she quickly climbed over Olga when she sat, anxious to look the new present over. Olga giggled and picked Helga up, placing her down in her lap quietly as she extended out her arms to present the gift.

"What is it?" Helga asked quickly as she prodded the ribbon. Olga laughed and untied it from her wrist, letting it hang.

"It's a ribbon, pretty and pink, just for you." Olga stated. Helga's eyes widened as Olga moved open her tiny fingers, placing the silk tie on her palms. Helga held it like a treasure before quickly exclaiming-

"It matches my dress!" She yelled out happily. Olga smiled and nodded, taking the ends in her fingertips.

"Would you like me to put it on for you?"

She was glad that Helga didn't notice the loud crash from downstairs.

"Yes please!" Helga exclaimed, moving anxiously as Olga giggled, pressing her long blond hair apart.

"Alright alright, sit still…" Olga pulled Helga's hair up and off of her neck, slowly moving the ribbon underneath as she pulled it besides Helga's ears, her fingertips working quickly to form a perfect bow a top of her head. When Olga was finished Helga hopped off quickly, standing on her tip toes to see herself in the mirror.

Helga suddenly blushed and touched it gently.

"…it's beautiful." She whispered. Olga smiled.

"You look wonderful in it Helga…it really suits you…" She whispered with a smile. Helga became a deep red and shook her head, her fingertips working to take it off.

"N-no, I can't…I can't have it, it's too pretty for someone…someone like me…I…I don't deserve this, Olga you should have it." Helga whispered as she tried to untie the bow. Olga frowned and walked over to Helga, getting down on one knee as she pushed back her sister's hair. Since when had thoughts like 'I'm not worthy' started to pop up in her head?

"No Helga…it's my gift to you…" she placed a hand over Helga's, stopping her from her.

"So treasure it….ok?" She asked happily. Helga looked down, her cheeks tinting red again as she nodded, her hands fidgeting with one another.

"...o-ok.."

Olga quickly grabbed Helga, throwing her in the air with a 'wee' as the front door slammed open and shut. She could hear her mother's sobbing as the car started to screech away. Helga's eyes moved to the door, knowing full well what was going on. Olga placed her down before rubbing the small girls back gently.

"Do you want to know a secret Helga?" She asked nervously. Helga seemed to come back from her sad thoughts, her eyes wandering to Olga.

"What kind of secret?" She whispered. Olga rubbed Helga's cheek with the back of her hand, pushing the stray hairs out of her eyes.

"A magical secret." She said lowly. Helga's eyes brightened for a moment, but then returned to her normal skeptical face. She raised a brow, moving her arms over one another as she scrunched up her nose.

"Alright, I'll bite….what's the secret?" She asked quickly. Olga smirked and placed a soft kiss on her sister's nose, a smile overtook her which she quickly tried to hide. Olga giggled and sat back on the bed, her baby sister in tow.

"It's a secret about a thing called love…"


	2. Part Two

_Look at me._

_Focus on me._

_I'm perfect, I'll never let you down, so never turn your eyes away from me. I can handle it. I can handle it so just don't look at her._

_Don't look at her and see your own mistakes, or see her innocence. Let her keep it. Look at me. Look at me and remember that I'm the perfect daughter, all you ever wanted. Stay happy. Stay happy and don't hit her. _

_Please don't ever hit her…_

_Look at me…don't ever turn your head away from me._

_Dad._

_Daddy…._

_Am I good enough now…?_

_Am I good girl Dad?_

"Olga look what I did!"

Helga's high pitched voice woke Olga from her slumber as she shot her eyes open, gasp escaping her as she rubbed her eyes sleepily. Helga pulled at Olga's sweater, her face giddy as she started to giggle. Olga rubbed her head without moving her own, unable to move. She was so tired…

She had spent all night studying on the three different finals she had tomorrow, and none of it seemed to stick. She'd have to pull another all-nighter if she wanted to get straight A's again. Olga closed her eyes softly, her body giving into her fatigue. Maybe it would be ok to just go in and pass, B's weren't that big of a deal.

Helga giggled and tugged at Olga again making Olga sit up quickly. She stared down at the happy and free face that looked upon her. She knew nothing of pressure or limits; whatever she could think up was what she could do, if she wanted to fly then with a little pixie dust she would be off the ground. Olga rubbed her eyes. She had to get A's, she had to be perfect so that Helga didn't have to be.

"What'd you do sweetie?" Olga asked gently. Helga giggled happily and pulled harder at Olga's clothing. Olga stood rubbing her eyes for a few moments with a yawn as she followed the skipping girl down the hallway. She reached pushed open the door to her room with both hands and plopped down on the floor next to the wall.

"Oh no Helga!" Olga screeched out a her eyes found what Helga had been so proud of. On her wall was an elaborately coloured crayon painting on a small section of Helga's wall. Helga looked up in fear at Olga's odd reaction, her eyes darting between Olga and her painting.

"…you don't like it?" She asked shakily.

"Helga, you know that you're not supposed to draw on the walls!" Olga squeaked out. Helga raised a tiny brow as she tilted her head. Olga's heart raced in her chest, what would their father do if he found her wall like this? Olga flinched at the thought and started to shake quickly pacing back and forth in Helga's room. She'd need to get it off of her wall before he came home, she'd need soap- and water- and a scrub brush-

"Why?" She asked. Olga blinked for a few moments, unable to move her eyes from the now tainted wall.

"Well, because dad said so." Olga muttered quickly. A flash of anger crossed over her face at the mention of their father as she rebelliously took a crayon in her hand and continued to colour. Olga yelped and reached out to stop her.

"Helga don't! Daddy will get mad!" Olga yelled out. Helga pouted out her lip, her eyes brows pushed down hard on her eyes as she stared angrily at the wall. Only four years old and she had already gotten down the death stare.

"At least he notices me when I do bad things…" Helga mumbled. Olga blinked for a few moments at her statement. Helga pushed the crayon so harshly into the wall that it broke in two in her hands. She closed her eyes and sighed hanging her head in defeat.

"…at least when he's yelling he looks at me…"

Olga sighed and plopped down next to Helga. She held out her hand and with a small and innocent glance of curiosity Helga placed a crayon in her hand. Olga started to draw alongside her, her eyes fading as a soft breath left her lips.

"Being ignored is better than being watched Helga." Olga warned.

"You wouldn't understand….mom and dad love you." Helga commented moving herself over so that she could draw closer to Olga's hand. Olga bit the inside of her cheek, taking in a deep breath.

"Mom and dad love you too."

But she knew she was lying, and Helga knew it too. She stared at her masterpiece sadly as Olga wrapped an arm around her shoulder, her fingers playing with the small girl's hair as she sighed.

"…I love you Helga, I love you enough for the two of them combined." That was the truth, though Olga wasn't sure if Helga knew it.

Helga nodded and crawled into her sister's lap as Olga kissed the top of her head. She smiled taking Helga's hand in her own as Helga guided her sister's arm to draw. Even at such a young age she was already making pictures much grander and more spectacular than her older sibling.

"You're going to do great things Helga." Olga whispered to her. Helga tilted her head up towards her sister, bright blue eyes shining as Olga's tears hit her soft face. Tenderly she reached out and wiped them away, a small smile on her face as she giggled.

"I love you Olga." She whispered happily.

"..I love you too Helga…so much."

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"Olga do you wanna play dollies?" Helga asked cheerfully as Olga pushed her hair back nervously, biting her lip as she erased something on her paper. She took a moment before re-writing it and erasing again. Olga groaned lowly and hit her head against her palm roughly.

"Stupid, stupid! Of course the answer isn't five, what are you a dunce?" Olga asked herself harshly. Helga saw that her sister hadn't heard her small words and quickly moved into her room. Olga didn't notice this either, fear rushed over her as Helga quickly checked over herself. Had it finally happened? Had she turned invisible?

"Olga?" Helga asked desperately. Olga twitched and sighed writing even faster.

"What is it Helga?" She asked, annoyance apparent in her voice. Helga tenderly walked over to her older sibling and pulled at her nightgown as she pointed to her room.

"I asked if you wanted to play dollies. We can reenact Macbeth, it'll be fun." Helga piped out cheerfully. Olga sighed and shook her head, swatting Helga's hand away as she went back to her paper, her eyes not even giving the girl so much as a glance. Helga stood bewildered as she stared down at her hands while Olga spoke.

"I'm really busy right now Helga, can you go ask mom to play with you or something?" Olga asked rubbing her temple. She'd had a killer headache for almost three days now and even the slightest noise or flash of light was enough to send her into tears from the pain. Helga was most defiantly not helping.

"She's drinking her smoothies, she's no fun to play with when she's drinking them…" Helga whispered sadly. Olga groaned before throwing down her pencil. Helga jumped back for a moment, staring at her sister in shock. Olga shook her head, taking in a deep breath to calm down.

"Have you asked Dad?" She snapped.

"….asked daddy?" Helga asked in surprise. Olga nodded pushing her bangs up.

"Yea, have you asked him?"

Helga looked cautiously at the door.

"…I…I don't really want to play with him." She stuttered out. Olga took no notice and quickly turned back to her work.

"Then play by yourself Helga, I've REALLY got to get back to these entrance exams so, if you don't mind." Olga pointed to the doorway but Helga was caught in a single thought in her mind. She suddenly smiled before looking up at Olga hopefully.

"You really think Dad will play with me?" She asked, excitement in her voice.

"HELGA!" Olga snapped hitting her desk. Helga twitched quickly looking down at the ground as she covered her head. Olga turned and sat horrified as she looked at the quivering girl. Olga sighed heavily and shook her head, her shoulders drooping as she closed her eyes.

"Look Helga I'm sorr-"

Olga opened her eyes as she heard the door slam shut. Olga bit her lip and rolled her head to look at the ceiling.

"…great."

Olga felt blackness overtaking her vision as she ran in P.E, her least favorite class. Since when did the world start spinning so quickly? Her pace slowed as she started to fall behind. Her body felt limp but she pressed on, she couldn't lose. Pataki's done lose. Something started to build up in her throat and it felt like a fire had been set to her stomach.

Olga doubled over, gripping it in pain as she choked back tears.

Not again.

Olga suddenly coughed, speckles of red lining the grass she stood upon as she gagged, throwing her hands over her mouth. Blood seeped through her fingers as her eyes widened. The girls behind her screamed as Olga stared in agony at the mess she had made. She fell to her knees and tried to wash it away.

Wash it away before he sees.

"OLGA!" She heard her teacher scream as she fell into the grass.

"So what's wrong with her doc?"

"It's Dr. Hall…" He corrected.

They didn't seem to care.

Bob and Miriam stood outside of Olga's hospital door as the doctor looked down at his chart, his fingers pressing up his glasses as he shook his head with a sigh. He placed the chart down and motioned for her two parents to take a seat. They begrudgingly complied, Bob's eyes moving back to the hospital room quickly.

"I'm afraid that Olga has an ulcer…a bleeding one to be more specific. Now, it's not deadly and it can be cured, however the fact that she has managed one of this level at such a young age worries me…" The doctor leaned against his desk, glancing over the parents quickly.

"Has Olga been having any trouble at school lately? Or at home?" He added, raising a brow.

"No!" Bob yelled out quickly, the pride coming up in him. Miriam groaned and shook her head, rubbing her temple as she let out a low breath.

"No…Olga's our perfect baby girl, she doesn't have trouble doing anything." The last of her words slurred. For the sake of keeping both of the adults on topic Dr. Hall chose not to bring it up. He coughed before placing his glasses on the desk, crossing one foot over the other.

"I've been Olga's doctor for a long time now Mr. and Mrs. Pataki, and sometimes I feel like I'm watching her wither away. She's a growing girl and she hasn't gained any weight since she turned twelve…speaking of which, I haven't even seen your youngest since she was born- I assume that she's a bouncing healthy baby girl?" The doctor asked, some edge in his voice.

Bob looked back from the hospital room.

"Who the girl? Yea she's fine, let's get back to Olga, now what the heck is this ulcer thing."

The doctor bit his lip and turned, rolling his eyes as he grabbed some pamphlets.

"I'm going to be brutally honest, Olga's pushing herself too hard. She's not eating enough and she's not getting enough sleep. I think she's so stressed about keeping herself perfect for you she's dug herself a hole that's devouring her body." The doctor snapped.

"AND, while we're at it, I would really like to see Helga before she starts pre-school, she's already missed all her vaccinations and with this latest discovery in Olga I'd like to make sure she's doing alright."

"Oh my poor baby girl…" Miriam whispered.

"Is she in a lot of pain?" Bob asked. Dr. Hall twitched.

"So when shall I set the date?"

"For what?" Bob asked.

"For Helga's visist…." The doctor looked about ready to snap the pen he was holding in two.

"Oh…do we have to?" He asked raising a brow. Dr. Hall sighed and nodded. Bob rolled his eyes muttering something about the system before taking the doctors schedule.

"I don't know, Friday. Now what can we do about OLGA?" He snapped. Dr. Hall sighed before placing his glasses back on.

"Keep her relaxed, cut back on the high acid foods- but be sure to keep her eating, and please for the love of God, just let her be like a normal high schooler for once…I'm sure that'll do loads more than any medicine I prescribe could…"

That night Olga had been ordered to the living room couch, a soft and pillow like blanket around her, her favorite meal cooked up fresh by her mother. For once she stayed sober, if only to watch over Olga to make sure she wasn't sick again.

She smiled gently to herself, a warm feeling wrapping around her as her father came and sat beside her.

"Now Olga you listen to me ok, the girl will be starting pre-school in a few weeks so I don't want you coming home to baby sit anymore. You just take it easy and build up your health and get back to being the you I know and love." Olga flinched. Why didn't he just love her as she was now?

Maybe she was looking too much into it…

"Olga, you said you were going to help me pick out my preschool outfit…"

Olga's eyes moved quickly to the small girl standing in front of the couch. How long had she been there?

"That's right- I'm sorry Helga, just gimmee a second and I'll-" Olga started to move the blanket off of her but her father moved his hand down quickly, keeping it pressed. She watched with tension as he moved his hands to shoo away his daughter, much like one would a stray animal on the street.

"Don't bother your sister right now, she's sick, go play in your room or something." Bob demanded. Helga blinked before looking up at Olga.

"But-"

"GO!" Bob growled out. Helga flinched, a gasp escaping her as she backed away. Olga opened her mouth but coughs overcame her words. Bob turned back to her, quickly grabbing some tea for her to drink. Olga closed her eyes, only for a moment, but when she opened them Helga was gone…

oooooooooooooooooooooo

First day of senior year. All she had to do was get through one more year, one more 'perfect' year and she would be out of this house and it's suffocating walls for good. Olga looked at herself in the mirror, twisting and turning to make sure that every little thing was in place.

Today was going to be perfect, she would make sure of it.

Olga grabbed her backpack, throwing it over her shoulder as she started down the stairs, she counted the steps, one, two, three, four-

"OLGA!"

Olga stopped in her tracks, her head turning quickly to her father who was sitting rather happily with her mother on the couch. Her heart brightened, it was the first time they'd been seen together in weeks. She quickly rushed down to them wondering what the occasion was. They smiled happily and wrapped their arms around her in a tight hug.

"Ahh that's my girl! You ready for your big day?" Bob asked joyfully. Olga smiled and nodded as he beamed down happily at her. Was this a dream? Miriam laughed happily before dabbing her eyes.

"My baby's getting so big…look at how beautiful she is Bob." She whispered. Bob smiled and nodded wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Olga was practically glowing.

"Why don't you play us a little tune before you leave sweet heart? Ah what's that one you were practicing yesterday? The one minute waltz or something." Bob stated. Olga smiled nodding quickly, she knew the one. She sat down at the piano, her mother and father moving by her sides like a shield of protection.

She smiled and put her fingers to the keys, her eyes closing gently as she started to play.

Whenever she played something magical happened, her body and mind were lifted away from one another, and while her fingers play across keys her imagination ran wild. The high notes and the lows, they all told a beautiful story of love and betrayal and coming home again.

In this particular fantasy she was rushing across the moon, jumping and dancing like a ballerina while her prince caught her in midair. It all came crashing down however as she heard the door slam.

Olga's eyes shot open as she looked around her, her mother and father were still beside her, clapping and praising her. She felt fulfilled, but a little part of her, hidden away, was screaming for her to wake up- to notice that this wasn't the family portrait she had painted in her mind's eye so long ago.

Something was missing…

"…isn't it Helga's first day of preschool today?" Olga whispered suddenly.

"Who?" Bob asked quickly.

Olga's heart stopped as she heard her father utter those words.

"…helga…your daughter…" Olga whimpered. Bob nodded.

"Oh, yea, I think she left already." He stated. Olga gasped and stood up quickly.

"She's only five! You were supposed to drive her!" Olga yelled. Bob's happy face slowly slipped away and Olga flinched looking down at the ground. Don't yell, don't speak out of turn. Perfect daughters don't speak unless spoken to.

"I'm sure she'll be fine…now you'd be hurry if you don't want to be late for school." Bob warned. Olga nodded heading out of the front door quickly. She rushed into her car, starting the engine quickly as the rain outside started to pour down harshly.

Where was Helga's school again?

Olga cruised down the street, her heart beating rapidly as she shot her head from side to side, looking for the small girl. Where could she be? Olga's foot twitched against the gas pedal as she tried to keep herself calm. Maybe she just sat somewhere waiting for her?

She drove for twenty minutes and skipped her first period looking but Helga had been nowhere in sight. When she gave up and checked in at the pre-school they had informed her Helga had arrived but she wasn't allowed inside.

What had started out as a way to protect Helga had grown into something more, something far more dangerous. She was craving the attention, she needed it to survive. If her parents didn't notice her, didn't compliment and accept her it was like her world didn't exist at all.

She was perfect or nothing.

And by doing this she was hurting the person she wanted to protect.

Olga rubbed her eyes and shook her head, no, everything was fine, she just needed some sleep was all. She was just tired, that's why she didn't see Helga leave this morning, that's why she got so nervous when her hand missed a key, it was just because she needed to sleep.

She needed…

"Olga are you alright?"

The kind and young voice of her teacher interjected into her thoughts. She looked up quickly at her noticing that the picture of her face was much blurrier than normal.

"Of course Mrs. Pierce why?" She asked her voice cracking.

"Why Olga, you're crying…" the woman whispered to her. Olga blinked for a few moments feeling the wetness under her eyes. She placed her fingertips to her cheek, feeling the hot burn of tear stained skin as another fell over her hand.

And once she felt that one tear another came, and another and another until Olga was quivering like a small child thrown from its mothers arms. Her classmates all turned, their burning eyes upon her as she started to hiccup. Olga held back a whimper in her throat as she quickly shut her eyes, biting on the inside of her cheek. She was a high school senior for God's sake, she couldn't be seen crying in class!

But they wouldn't stop, and they just kept pouring faster and faster until sobs made their way out of Olga's unwilling body.

"Olga?" Her teacher asked in surprise. Olga winced and rubbed her eyes quickly as she sobbed harder.

"Don't tell my dad…please…please…"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"And as your valedictorian, let my closing words to this year's class be this- congratulations and good luck, I expect great things out of all of you!" There was a roar from the audience and her fellow classmates and Olga giggled, standing proud in her ceremonial graduation robe, adorned with medals and ropes. Tears strolled down on her gleaming cheeks as she giggled, covering her mouth.

This was the day she had been waiting for, all that hard work, it had all finally started to pay off and here she was, diploma in hand with a roar of followers behind her. She could hardly hear the principal declare them official graduates, her mind was too caught up in dreams of things soon to come.

Everyone threw their caps into the air and she giggled doing the same.

This was the happiest day of her life.

"Ohh honey! We're so proud of you!" Miriam choked out through sobs as she threw her skinny arms around Olga. Olga laughed and hugged her mother back tightly as Bob took pictures from the sidelines. He stepped in, grabbing Olga in his large arms before lifting her off the ground in a large bear hug.

"Daddy!" Olga giggled out as he placed her back down.

"You did good sweet heart, I still can't believe you've graduated…your mom and I were talking about it all morning, these years with you have just gone by so fast…" He whispered kissing her forehead. Olga smiled and scrunched up her face, giggling again.

"OH! That reminds me, how was Helga's graduation, was it cute, did anyone cry?" Olga asked quickly. Bob and Miriam blinked for a minute before looking at each other. Olga flinched. They didn't…

"Oh, that was today wasn't it…" Miriam stuttered.

They did.

Olga sighed and rubbed her temple, she'd have to make it up to her tonight. She looked around noticing the lack of little sister next to her parents. She bent down, trying to see if she might have gotten lost in the crowd. Olga stood, clenching her hands as she bit her lip.

"Where is…Helga?" She asked slowly.

Miriam thought for a few moments before snapping her head up.

"Oh I think she's at home…" Miriam whispered scratching her ear nervously. Olga took in a deep breath, trying to keep her anger under control. She had practice all day in the hot sun, then the ceremony, all they had to do was watch Helga until she could get home.

That was all.

They just had to pay attention to her for one hour, that's all she needed.

Olga rolled her eyes and pushed past her parents, not turning back even as they called her name. While the kids celebrated on the foot ball field of their school Olga slammed her car door, heading home.

It didn't take long, she was home before she even knew it, the street lights seemed to pass by like a flash and soon she was standing outside of her front door. Olga, still in her robes, fetched her key out of her purse and placed it into the lock.

At least Helga had learned to lock the door behind her parents.

She slowly pressed the door open, the light from the moon light outside filling the dark hallway. Olga stepped in and closed the door behind her, turning on the hall light. Olga gasped as she saw Helga sitting on one of the stair steps, staring blankly at the ground.

In her hands she held a tiny graduation cap, her fingers still squeezing onto it tightly.

"Helga…" Olga called out. Helga didn't budge, her nearly grey eyes stared lifelessly ahead of her. Olga sighed and wrapped her arms around the young girls shoulders, hugging her tightly.

"Helga I'm so sorry…" She whispered.

Helga suddenly pushed her sister away, not even looking at her as she dropped her cap to the ground.

"Why do you not want them to love me…" Helga muttered. "You just keep stealing them…why…why are you doing this to me…"

Olga leaned back as if she had been slapped across the face, her eyes watering all the same. Helga didn't notice and merely turned away, her hands following limply along the rails. She slowly stopped, her foot hitting against a step as her soft voice carried throughout the house.

"I hate you…"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

"Come on Helga, you're almost there, just push a little harder!"

Olga wiped the sweat off of Helga's forehead as she suddenly leaned back into her pillow, her eyes rolling into the back of her head, her chest rising and falling quickly as she started to go into shock. She had never seen her sister in so much pain before. Helga moaned, suddenly yelling at the top of her lungs as she clung onto the bed for dear life.

Olga heard a small mutter escape the doctor's lips as he called a nurse over to him.

"We've got a breech birth, Helga, you're going to need to get this baby out fast." The doctor called out to her. Helga's head snapped up, rather angrily as she stared at him with her wild eyes.

"You think I'm not trying?" Helga growled. Helga grabbed Olga by her shirt and pulled her in, gasp leaving her lips as she gulped.

"What's wrong with my baby?"

Olga gulped for a moment before placing her hand on top of Helga's in an attempt to uncurl her fingers. It didn't work.

"He's coming out the wrong way…he might not get enough oxygen if he's not born fast enough." Olga explained. Under the influence of such a strong epidural Helga could only knit her brows together in confusion as she shook his head.

"What like he'll be really uncomfortable or-"

"Helga he could die." Olga said quickly. Helga's eyes shot open as she thrust herself back into the bed. This didn't last long however for pain over took the terror of having her child be born dead. Helga's lips suddenly started to quiver as she cried out, thrusting her body upwards.

"AH! I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS ANYMORE!" Helga screamed, her voice going high as tears of agonizing pain rained down her cheeks. Olga flinched as Helga yelled out filling the room with her screams of pain. Olga ran her fingers through her sweaty blonde hair whispering words of encouragement.

"You're doing great Helga, come on baby sister, just a little more."

"THAT'S WHAT YOU SAID TWO HOURS AGO!" Helga screamed out at Olga. She moaned throwing her head back as she started to cry a bit harder, her breath becoming fast and shallow. Helga suddenly clutched her chest her vitals going off the chart.

"Helga you need to calm down." The doctor warned as he heard the machine beep more rapidly.

"Doctor! She's hyperventilating!" The nurse called out. The doctor nodded and pinched Helga's leg to try and get her attention.

"We don't have any choice, if we give her any more morphine she wouldn't be able to deliver."

Olga's eyes shot up toward her vitals as Helga gasped for breath. Helga held onto her throat her mind split between the soul tearing pain she was enduring and her lack of breath. Olga's eyes darted around before she stood over Helga.

"Helga you need to focus!" Olga yelled out. Helga was too far gone, her eyes started to gloss as she shook her head.

"I need Arnold, I need Arnold, where is he, I need him." Helga sobbed out.

The hospital room fell silent as a loud and echoing slap was heard. Helga, now with her face pushed against the pillow with a large red mark upon her cheek, slowly fixed her eyes upon the teary eyed girl with her hand extended.

"Helga!" Olga yelled. "You are going to be a MOTHER! Now shut the hell up and FOCUS!"

"O-…ok…." Helga whispered. She nodded her confidence building; Olga noted her strong breathing as Helga scrunched up her face groaning in pain.

"GET OUT YOU SON OF A BITCH!"

oooooooooooooooooooooo

Olga stared at her ceiling, all of the things around her packed. Boxes lined the walls. This place didn't even feel like home anymore. She kneaded her fingers into her clothing, nervously glancing around her. Tomorrow she would leave for college and with it, she would leave this room, her parents, and most importantly…

She would leave Helga.

For nineteen years she had convinced herself that getting good grades and winning would solve any little problem that their family had. But…thinking that way just made her more insane each day, it made her feel like her father…

This was one of the many reasons she'd chosen a college half way around the country. She couldn't stand to be in this place anymore, just being around her family made her want to choke a small animal until it turned blue.

It was selfish and she knew it, but Olga was running away.

It was a socially acceptable way of running away, but she couldn't pretend that it was anything different.

Olga moved her hands over her eyes as she took in a shaky breath. It wasn't wrong to want to be good at things, and she knew that this wasn't a habit that she could kill over night. She'd settle for getting a B on a test and not feeling like the worst scum on the Earth. Or even to study for a test for five hours and no longer. Hell, she'd even be content if she didn't feel like her life was measured in grades and test.

Maybe though, just maybe someday she'd learn to see the world through Helga's eyes- from eyes that could look at a blank piece of paper and not stumble for instructions. For eyes that would take that blank canvas and paint something beautiful; something that no one had ever seen before…

Olga would give anything to have the mind of that little poet. To be so free, without restrictions….

Olga flinched and shook her head, who was she kidding? Of course Helga didn't have any restrictions on her mind; there was no one there to even place them for her. Olga groaned and dug her head into her pillow. She had tried so hard to keep her parents from hurting Helga that she in turn punished the girl in the worst way possible.

To her parents Helga was a fly on the wall, invisible until they got in her way, and when she did-

Olga flinched at the imagery. This set her mind in motion of what else could go wrong.

Olga silently worried if Miriam would remember to feed her, or if Bob would drive her to school like he promised. Olga bit down on her lip harshly as hot tears started to pour down her face. This was her fault…it was all her fault. She had horrible parents, but at least they were her own. At least she had moments of true love and care.

Helga…Helga didn't have any of that. Olga had stolen it from her, even if it was in good will.

Helga wouldn't remember the times she protected her or the long nights of playing dolls while their parents fought. She'd never know how many nights she stayed awake trying to better herself so that Helga didn't have to. She'd never remember any of those things because she would grow older, and new memories would replace them.

Memories of parents fighting, forgetting her name, hurting her mentally, hurting her physically, being ignored, being forgotten. Those are the things she would remember. And once every year a stranger calling herself her sibling would appear and talk as though they were still close, as though she was still loved unconditionally, as though she was still her 'big sister'.

Olga stifled her sobs as she heard a small voice coming from the wall. Raising her head she wiped her eyes quickly. Helga? What was she doing up this late. Olga slowly tip toed out of her room, crossing to Helga's door. She pressed her ear against the frame, hearing Helga's small voice protruding the silence.

"When to the sessions of sweet silent thought, I summon up remembrance of things past. I sigh the lack of many a thing I sought,"

"And with old woes new wail my dear time's waste…" Olga finished her eyes watering again. As a baby she would read those words to her over and over again until she fell asleep. It was one of her favorite lines, one that she wanted to share.

Olga slowly creaked open Helga's door, staring in through the small slit as her sister pranced around with one of her sheets thrown over her like a Greek princess. With a loud call Helga moved her hand into the air, reaching towards the moon as she continued.

"Then can I drown an eye, unused to flow. For precious friends hid in death's dateless night" Helga called out dramatically, thrusting her hand down to her chest.

"Ow." Helga whispered moving her hand quickly.

"And weep afresh love's long since cancell'd woe. And moan the expense of many a vanish'd sight"

Helga sat down on her bed, kicking her feet until the sheets moved off of her ankles. Once her small toes were free she continued dramatically.

"Then can I grieve at grievances foregone. And heavily from woe to woe tell o'er" Helga threw out her arms, pretending to fly across the carpet as she giggled, throwing the sheet up so that it followed her like a cape. Olga smiled softly to herself.

"The sad account of fore-bemoaned moan. Which I knew pay as if not paid before!" Helga suddenly stopped her playing and looked at her dresser, a soft and serious expression overcoming her. Her lips opened in turn with Olga's as they whispered the same line.

"But if the while I think on thee, dear friend… all losses are restored and sorrows end." Helga suddenly swooned before falling back down on her bed holding a paper valentine in her hand. She giggled and tossed and turned before kissing it.

"Oh Arnold, Arnold I love you!"

Olga laughed under her breath before shaking her head, her fingers gently closing Helga's door. Olga peeked into her room, the boxes suddenly seeming less ominous now.

"You know what…I think you're going to be just fine without me Helga…" Olga whispered through the door though she knew her sister couldn't hear her. With a sigh of content she went back into her room and laid down, finally at peace with herself.

oooooooooooooooooooooo

Olga sat on the bed cradling her sister's head as Helga stared down upon the beautiful baby boy lying in her arms. He moved his gums in what looked like a smile as he reached out his hands, feeling blindly around. Helga's lip quivered as she moved one finger down his cheek.

"…he's so small…" Helga whispered in disbelief. Helga laughed gently and poked his nose, he made an odd high pitched sound of joy and attempted to grab onto her finger. Helga sniffed holding back tears as his small hands traced down her in comparison huge thumb. Olga stroked her sister's hair, still sweaty and frizzed.

"What are you going to call him?" She asked in the softest of voices.

"Phillip." Helga whispered with a small crack in her voice. "Phil Shortman."

"Helga…may I ask you something?"

"Is it something dumb?"

"Probably."

"I guess if I can't stop you…"

"Why'd you call me?"

"Uhhh doi, it's because I thought you might want to know I was preggers."

"…do mom and dad know?"

"…no."

"Are you going to let them see him?"

"I don't know…I lost contact with Bob a long time ago, so who knows where he is…as for Miriam, she can come visit after she's done with her program…"

"She's doing really well this time…" Olga noted.

"I think having Bob out of the house made it a lot easier. Do you still talk to him?"

"Sometimes…mostly through email…but the messages are never that long."

"…I know that I never asked…but…did he hit you?"

"Once or twice, I can't remember. What about you…did he stop when I left?" Four times, she could tell you the days off of the top of her head.

"I guess so, he judst did it when I did something really bad." Like forget to wash the dishes, or got a b on her report card.

Both girls sat in silence, watching as Phil twisted and squirmed underneath Helga's grip.

"Do you want to hold him…?"

"Ohgodyes" Olga whispered quickly as she grabbed Phil out of Helga's hands and into her arms. For the first time that night Helga laughed and leaned back into her pillow. Olga cooed at the young baby, rubbing her nose against his own. She smiled and played with the tuff of hair on top of his head.

"Did you know it was going to be a boy?" Olga asked quietly.

"No…Arnold and I wanted it to be a surprise- where the hell is that impregnating son of a bitch anyways?"

"Really? What were you going to name him if he was a she?" That was a weird sentence to say. Helga muttered something under her breath quickly that Olga didn't quite catch. She looked up from playing with the baby and tilted her head.

"Come again baby sister?"

"We were gonna call her that- name" Helga stuttered out "You know the one, the other way of saying Helga." She muttered quickly looking away from her sister with a bright blush upon her cheeks. Olga blinked for a few moments before giggling.

"…you mean 'Olga'?" She whispered.

"Is that what it is?" Helga asked shaking her head "Oh well never mind then, forget it."

Phil suddenly squealed out, giggling as he grabbed onto a lock of Olga's hair, pulling her down so that he could play with her face again.

"Nnph, he's got your grip." Olga laughed out. Helga smirked and whispered 'good boy' under her breath.

"You're going to be a wonderful mother Helga…" Olga whispered as she started to sniff, tears building up again. Helga smiled and kissed Phil's nose, making him giggle out quickly. She grinned, her own eyes watering as she nodded, tossing him up and down with the hilt of her arm.

"I know…I learned from the best…" Helga shot Olga a glance, so quick and faint that Olga thought that she might have been imagining it. And cautiously, Olga hugged her sister to her, her voice dropping to the softest level.

"…I love you Helga…"

There was a pause, and for a moment Olga was ready to accept Helga's silence. Then, like a baby's whisper Helga stuttered out-

"…I love you too…."


End file.
